Toddler Wisdom, Shoe Perfection, and Going Somewhere

"... the thousands upon thousands who are like me are those who have yet to find the professional skin to fit the riot in their souls..."
-Seymour Krim

A few years ago, when he was three, my nephew Ian liked to say, "I want to go Somewhere." And, when Ian said it, you knew it was Somewhere with a capital "S."

Hey, Buddy, who doesn't?

It excited me to see that at the ripe age of three, wanderlust grew strong in this young Jedi.

I like looking at Ian, now five, more precocious, and more determined to make his little dreams come true. Scratch that, they are huge dreams, and they are all possible for him right now. The dreams don't compete with each other, but together all of his dreams propel him forward simultaneously. I mean why settle on just one, right? This brings me to the quotation above.

It comes from a favorite essay, "For My Brothers and Sisters in the Failure Business." Seymour Krim wrote this treatise in the 70s after a life time of "settling." Some would debate his "settling." Krim experienced success as a phenomenal essayist and longtime contributor to "The New Yorker." No slouch, but he still had longings and dreams to be more, to do more and to constantly reinvent the self.

Hey, Buddy, who doesn't?

Every now and then I get that feeling of "Crap. What am I going to do with my life?" It's as if I'm not doing "it" right now: as if I'm not Somewhere, and that a subtle reinvention will be the answer.

So lately, I've been thinking about going back to school. Certainly additional education will take me Somewhere and will help me find that professional skin. I still have lots of dreams, but unlike Ian, mine compete and don't feel like they can coexist. Should I become a librarian, a lawyer, maybe? When I think about changing my life, and certainly this isn't the first time, I get excited for a while, then I think of the reality of going back to school and then I think about something completely different and much much more pleasant like buying a new pair of shoes. I mean there's a commitment and a little reinvention. Why settle for just one pair of shoes to fit the riot in my soul, Seymour Krim? Why not have multiple pairs for my mood and whimsy?

So this weekend I am going shoe shopping. My shoe shopping record is 3 pairs in one day. On that day of triumph, I was ably assisted by my good friend Teri. It's important to have a good support system. Teri was there to talk me through each pair and to let out an enthusiastic little clap each time I handed the plastic over. For some of you, I know that buying 3 pairs in one day might not be much of a record, but keep in mind Montana is no Jimmy Choo Mecca, folks.

So I'll keep you posted on whether or not I choose a slight variation on my growing collection of practical (yawn) clogs, or if I strike out and buy those completely impractical Apple-Green Steve Madden boots. If I am going to start on an endless me, if I'm going to go Somewhere, why not do it with an amazing array of shoes? I better call Teri, I feel the need to make my nephew proud.